Memo
To: Friends, Family,
Blog-o-Sphere
From: Blue and Bettina’s Mumma
Date: April 1, 2013
Subject: Major Decision
From: Blue and Bettina’s Mumma
Date: April 1, 2013
Subject: Major Decision
I wanted to share with all of my friends, family and blog-o-sphere
friends the life altering decision I have been agonizing over for the last
month. It was not an easy decision to
reach but I gave it a lot of soul searching and I feel pretty good that the new
direction I will be going in is the right decision for me.
It is no secret that I am a fanatic regarding all things
greyhound. And particularly my own
babies. Greyhounds are among the things
that make me most happy in life. Since I
can think of nothing better than to be a retired racing greyhound, I have
decided to make that dream come true. I
will be giving notice at my job and taking some time away to make this a
reality.
I have found a plastic surgeon in Kuala Lumpur who
specializes in human to canine plastic surgery.
He has assured me that by the time he is done, I will be a very tall
greyhound. I’m probably going to have to
pay a little extra for the necessary liposuction or I’ll also look like a very
fat greyhound. I believe that skipping
the initial life phases of a greyhound is best in my particular case. I’ve never been a very fast runner and I
stuck to the field events while on the track team in high school. So I will go directly to the retirement
portion of a greyhound’s life.
I have decided the best way to pay for the numerous
procedures I’ll need is to mortgage the house.
Then I’ll rent it out and build a lovely kennel on part of the
land. Whoever rents the house will have
charge of feeding, watering and poop-scooping for Blue, Bettina and I.
I am very excited to step into this new chapter in my
life. I’m looking forward to a life of
ease with comfy beds, treats and snuggles.
We ask that all our friends send your best thoughts for a successful and
ultimately rewarding transition. Since I
will no longer be able to type once I have paws, this will be my final blog
entry.
at last!! a full bitch!!
ReplyDeleteI always did think it would be great to come back as one of my own dogs! Enjoy your new life of leisure!
ReplyDeletePS Loved the comment you left on my blog. It was laugh out loud funny!
I knew we could count on something "insanely" great from you today! Just go quietly with those nice young men in their nice white coats...
ReplyDeleteCRAZY! Downright crazy and what a perfect announcement today!
ReplyDeleteI am so jealous. Who doesn't look at their spoiled greyhounds and think that is definitely the life. One thought though. You may fly there first/business class, but they will stick you in a crate in cargo on the trip back. Eek!
ReplyDeleteI have thought before that they live the life. You just have to make sure that you get a good owner that will spoil you properly.
ReplyDeleteLove this post! Gave me a good laugh. If I ever come back as something other than human, I'd want to be a spoiled house pet. They have the life!
ReplyDeleteI love to see good pet owners like you. I work with animals at my job and I see too many bad things. When I go around blogland and read people's stories and see their pictures, it makes my heart happy!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Your April Fools' Day went SO much better than mine! Where can I sign up for surgery?
ReplyDeleteSTay human. Who will drive the dogs to the park, or give them there treats or worse yet Cinnamon wonders who will really be top dog? Have a wonderful Wednesday!
ReplyDeleteLol, you had me going there for a bit!
ReplyDeleteI think I can comment now, but I've forgotten what I was going to say, lol! A great post:)
ReplyDelete